Signs You’re Married to a Realtor - From the Spouse’s Point of View (A Cry for Help... but with Love)
Being married to a Realtor is like being in a committed relationship with both your spouse and the MLS. And while I love them deeply, I also now know more about water heaters, property lines, and appraisals than I ever wanted to.
Here are just a few signs that you, too, might be married to a Realtor:
Your dinner soundtrack is a one-sided negotiation.
Nothing says “romantic meal” like hearing phrases such as “We’re still waiting on the inspection report” or “They countered, but it’s not strong enough.” I’ve learned to nod supportively and chew quietly while escrow drama unfolds between bites of meatloaf.
You don’t call it a car anymore. You call it ‘the mobile office.’
Need a pen? There are 14 in the cupholder. Need a water bottle? There’s one under every seat. Need to show a house right now? Great! There’s a suit jacket in the trunk, a lockbox key in the console, and enough business cards to wallpaper a bathroom.
You’ve forgotten what a weekend feels like.
Saturday = Open House.
Sunday = Second showings.
Monday = Exhausted Realtor crash day.
Our “date nights” usually consist of me tagging along to a final walkthrough while we eat Chick-fil-A in the car. Honestly, it’s kind of romantic… if you're into that sort of thing.
You can’t go anywhere without hearing, “Is that house still available?”
Church. Gym. Grocery store. Even on vacation. Apparently, there is no such thing as Realtor PTO. I once watched my spouse negotiate a counteroffer while he was standing on a balcony from a cruise ship and heading up a mountain on a ski lift chair.
You speak fluent real estate.
Terms like “comps,” “pocket listings,” and “due diligence” now roll off your tongue with the ease of a licensed agent. You haven’t passed the real estate exam, but honestly, you probably could.
You’ve learned to emotionally support strangers.
There’s the newlywed couple who didn’t get their dream house. The sweet family who got outbid for the third time. And the investor who didn’t read the HOA rules (again). And who listens to their tears? That’s right. You do. You, the unpaid real estate therapist.
You’ve given up on a normal phone ringtone.
Ding! That’s a Zillow lead.
Buzz! That’s a client texting at 11:45 PM.
Ringtone? It’s now the dulcet tone of “We’re under contract!!”
Which is great news… until we’re not under contract anymore 48 hours later.
Your home is a revolving door of candles, flyers, and anxiety.
Staging furniture. Listing photos. Closing gifts. Marketing folders. “Don’t touch that throw pillow, it’s for a shoot!” My entire guest bedroom is now a real estate supply closet. And I’m afraid to ask questions.
Realtor Vacations: The Great Myth of “Time Off”
Ah, vacation. That magical time when you pack your bags, set your out-of-office reply, and promise your spouse, kids, or friends that “this time, I’m really going to unplug.”
Spoiler alert: you’re not.
If you’ve ever traveled with a Realtor—or are one—then you know a Realtor vacation is just real estate in a different timezone.
You wouldn’t change it for the world.
Yes, it’s a chaotic, unpredictable, and often stressful ride being married to a Realtor—but it’s also inspiring. To see your spouse hustle, solve problems, juggle emotions, and help people find home... there’s a certain magic in that.
(But seriously, if we could just have one uninterrupted dinner a month, that’d be cool too.)
Dedicated to all the spouses and partners behind the scenes. You're basically honorary Realtors now. Godspeed.
Wyatt Poindexter - The Agency Oklahoma
